If Pittsburgh Bars Were Kardashians…

I was really bored when this topics came to mind. Obviously this is all a matter of opinion, and if you can’t find humor in it than I’m sorry about your life.

1. The Flats • Kylie

… I mean this one was so obvious I feel I don’t have to explain it, but it’s the perfect mix of trashy and sexy. Therefore without any further explanation, Kylie Jenner is The Flats on Carson.

2. Perle • Kim

Is it because it looks down on everyone else in Market Square or because the boujee specialty drinks look good on the outside, but kind of suck when you actually taste them?… I’m taking about you “Melon Ball” or whatever your name is. Getting off topic. Either way… Ladies and gentlemen, the Kim Kardashian West of Pittsburgh bars.

3. Butcher and the Rye • Kourtney

The aesthetic of Butcher and the Rye makes it the perfect Kourtney K spot. I’ll admit, Kourt was difficult, but at the end of the day just has to be Butcher and the Rye.

4. The Lemont • Kris Jenner

Just as it sits pretentiously at the top of Mount Washington overlooking the entire city, Kris Jenner sits in her Calabasas mansion overlooking her massive empire. The classiness of the establishment is only the cherry on top of the perfect pair that is Kris Jenner and the Lemont.

5. Element • Caitlin

There’s drag shows here, it’s a hell of a good time. Bruce would have been dressing up and sneaking in here on business trips, but now that all is right with the universe… it’s Caitlin’s Burgh bar!

6. Social House • Kendall

Tell me it’s not… you can’t. Kendall Jenner and Social House are like peas and carrots. Plus, I feel like Kendall is always eating sushi (not a diehard fan though, could be wrong), so it’s fitting and the overall vibe of the place is very Kendall J.

7. Jack’s • Rob

It’s sloppy and it’s kind of gross, but you’ll never turn your back on it. Robert, you’re home.

8. Tequila Cowboy • Lord Disick

What I wouldn’t give to see LD in his prime riding the bull, throwing $100 bills into the crowd and then tearing it up on the mic in the karaoke bar… I bet he would do a hell of a rendition of Nelly and the St Lunatics love ballad of the century, “Tip Drill”.

9. Cavo • Khloe

It’s the grown up version of The Flats… Khloe is the grown version of Kylie… anddd there ya have it. Cavo is the KhloMoney of bars.

Short and sweet on this one. Hope you enjoyed.



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